so i have let a few days slide in between blogs and im sorry. I have actually left the house and gone out lately and it has caught up on me, therefore lack of posts!
But, no excuses, im back writing.
Lately, as you all know, i have currently moved. Therefore, leaving old friends behind, returning to highschool friends and beginning to meet new potential friends. Lets put it this way... a lot of friendship groups are coming and going, and i dont want anything to change.
If you have ever moved, or you have left friends behind or moved to a completely new area you would have suffered this. You dont want to let go of the people who you know longer see, and you dont want to prevent yourself from meeting new people. YOU DONT WANT ANYTHING TO CHANGE
But unfortunately, as the earth still spins, change is guaranteed and life goes on.
So, this blog is more about, how to deal with change and how to make new friends, whilst maintaining old friends.
#1. Just because you move, doesnt mean you have to forget what you left behind. I still contact my friends from two different cities and we are closer than ever. If you have friends, that you know you want to keep for life, they'll pay you the same respect. Its a two way street and you cant just expect them to call you all the time and wait on you like a lost puppy. You have to call them and want to keep in contact with them just as much as they do. Its not hard. An odd txt message or now, seeing as technology is so advanced- even a facebook message or wall post doesnt hurt. It keeps the friendship fresh and lets your old friends know that you still think of them and that when the time comes, you will catch up and things will be the same.
From experience, i have moved from sydney 5 years ago. Although it was everyday contact, i still kept in touch with my high school friends and just recently after being away for 5 years, i am back. And although with time it wont be as nerve wracking, i am able to slowly slip into my old friendship group and meet up with my friends i have known since grade 7!
#2. Returning to friends that you have previously moved away from. Its hard. Because you move and you meet new people and just as soon as you think you are settled you return back to where you moved from and BANG everything has changed. Its not necessarily a bad thing, its just different and it takes some time adjusting to it. You cant expect everyone to remain the same and you cant expect everyone who once liked you, to still like you. People grow up, as well as their opinions and their attitude along with them. Sometimes you just have to accept that you weren't meant to be friends, or maybe their is a perfectly good reason as to why you aren't friends anymore. But the main thing (what i am figuring out now) is to be open. Engage in contact with your old friends, go out, put in the effort to meet them. Although it may be a little awkward at first, the friendship is still there and it may take some time, but soon you will be laughing about how you threw things at your grade 8 teacher in maths. If you are open to them, and they are a true friend, they'll return the favour. It shows that you want to be friends with them and that most importantly, you haven't forgotten them. You WERE friends for a reason when you were younger, so why shouldnt you now?
#3. Making new friends. Easier said than done, but it can be done. This also depends on your personality, but each to their own. I find it quite hard. Although people would say i am quite outgoing and 'loud', i am the most shy and awkward person to be around when i am first meeting people. What do i say, do i look alright, do i try to impress them or be myself? A thousand questions which leave me blank. But although i have faults, i pull through. I put myself in situations where i am able to talk to people and get to know them, and they are able to get to know me. I also find that it is easier if you ask them the questions. 'Ice breakers', although sometimes corny and annoying, they are fucking useful.
And, in the odd occasion that you hit a wall and you are standing there awkwardly with nothing to talk about, then walk away. Don't waste your time in awkward situations, they will get you nowhere.
Making friends is hard though. Its hard to be open to people who you know nothing about. But, with this in mind, they know nothing about you, so you have nothing to lose. My last job, is a classic example. I was a shy, and quiet girl and for the first time, i moved to a city where i knew noone. I had no choice but try to make some friends and your workplace is the perfect place. Not only are you constantly around these people, but you have the same interests. Whether you are working for the money or for the fun of it, you are both there in the same boat... and you are kind of forced to talk to each other. Needless to say, i am happy to announce that i have made friends for life at my old work and i hope to do the same at my new work in sydney.
If you take the time to hang around and be interested in other people, they will be interested in you, and you will be surprised at how your life will change when your friendship group opens to people you have moved away from and moving into.
So as a note, if you are going to move, in the midst of moving or you have moved, its going to be okay. Change scares the shit out of me, but it has made me who i am today and i have met some incredible people along the way. Change can only make you stronger, but it can also open you and broaden your personality. Its the best thing that has happened to me, and i can guarantee that it will do the same for you.
So again, sorry for the 3 day wait in between blogs, i hope to keep on track with things from now on, and hopefully no more writers block!
Adios fellow bloggers,
ill speak to you again soon x
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